Bonding with your baby
Posted on June 27 2016
One of the strongest bond any child has is with his/her parents. Even romantic relationships can come and go, but once you've bonded with your baby you're probably hooked for life.
It is also said that the strong ties between parents and children provide the baby's first model of intimate relationships and foster a sense of security and positive self-esteem. A parent's responsiveness to an infant's signals can also affect the child's social and cognitive development.
As parents, you are the best gift to your baby. The love and attention you give your baby in the first few years will stay with him or her forever and will help your baby grow into a healthier and happier child and adult. You know your baby the best and thus you are in a better position to recognize and fulfil your child's needs. Love, warmth and affection give your child energy to learn, grow, connect with others and live life happily.
The Bonding Rules To Remember
1. Take pleasure in your relationship with your child
Babies are born with the desire and capacity to experience happiness from their parents. Share and express your feelings with your child, it helps make the attachment stronger and creates a sense of security within the child.
2. Follow your child's lead
Sensitive and responsive caregiving is a building block to secure attachment with your baby. Your baby feels understood and valued when you pay attention to the subtle cues he/she may show for attention, exploration, and comfort.
3. Provide consistency and predictability in care routines
Routines help your baby feel secure. Predictable support and nurturance help your baby internalize a feeling of being cared for. This allows a secure attachment to develop.
4. Don’t worry about 'spoiling' your baby
There is no such thing like spoiling an infant, no matter what you hear or are told by your fellow relatives and friends. Be responsive to your child's needs, it actually helps to promote a sense of self-confidence, self-reliance, and independence as your child grows.
5. Provide a holding environment for your baby
Touch is as important as sleep or food for your child. A sense of love, warmth and security are conveyed when you hold him/her. When your child is distressed, holding him/her helps her to feel calm and safe. Remember that your calm, gentle, physical presence conveys a sense of connection and safety to your child.
6. Provide freedom and space to safely explore new environments
Your young toddler will benefit from your support when he is ready and able to explore his/her world. At this time your child needs your support, reassurance, security, and encouragement as he/she will be experiencing things on their own for the first time. The secure attachment that was nurtured during infancy with your love and support will provide your toddler with a sense of security and efficacy whenever he/she needs it.
To summarize, developing a bond is an ongoing partnership between you and your baby, but it doesn’t mean you have to be the perfect parent.
Just Be Yourself And Enjoy Parenting!
About The Expert
Namrata Jain is our Consulting Psychologist at Brainsmith. She has a Masters in Psychology from Mumbai University and has worked with children and adults to help them achieve a better state of mind by encouraging healthy mental and behavioural growth.